I have the most incredible husband in the
universe. Without him, my asthma would have had a deeper
emotional impact that it did. I owe him not only my life, but my
sanity as well.
When I finally accepted that I had asthma, the only goal I had in mind
was to be able to breathe. I spent months admiring the beauty and work
of my lungs when working properly and imagining how they looked when
I had an attack. The same process applied to the cells. I also stopped taking breathing for
granted as I couldn't afford that luxury anymore. In those days I was doing my best
to keep the simplest function of breathing going.
I also developed fear, (something I had never felt before), my
behavior changed, not only because I couldn't breathe, as some of
the medications contributed to mood changes, but because I could
suffocate at any moment. Watching the face of a member
of your family can completely turn the panic you are experiencing to
just an attack, or it will magnify the panic you are experiencing. If the person that is with you while you are
having an asthma attack stays calmed and does not show any fear, the
panic you are feeling will be transformed to only an urge of doing
your best to breathe without any fear involved. If the person
starting next to you has a contrary reaction to your asthma attack,
your fear and panic will increase tremendously. That is why is so important that
members of your family, or friends don't show fear, concern yes, fear no.
I was looking at my husband one of the many days he was helping me with the
nebulizer. For the first time, I paid attention to the expression
on his face and I could see some of the emotions he was going through.
I realized that every time I got ill he would suffer not only for me
but for our son and him as well. If affects him tremendously when I am sick.
My husband is amazing. He took total responsibility for my
condition and he started to leave his job and come home when I
had bad asthma attacks. He would go to the doctor with me, get the
prescriptions from the drug store, kicking and screaming he would take me to the emergency room at
any given time of the day, and would keep control around the house.
He also started to give me my pills every day as sometimes I would
forget to take them when I was supposed to.
For the first time I realized how much was he suffering due to my
illness. He was deeply affected. However, he does not complain about
anything, and he has not complained about my asthma as of today.
My son gets very upset when he sees me ill. Even though he controls
his emotions as much as he can, his behavior changes and becomes
incredibly protective. He will not leave me alone while I am sick and
if I get into a threatening situation, he calls my husband while
handling
what is going on.
The family of an asthmatic puts on hold their lives while the
person is having an attack or is in the hospital. The day-to-day
routine changes and a lot of the activities are planned around the
activities the asthmatic can do. They are also deeply affected because
they see how much their loved one's life is in danger and
there is a deep fear of losing the one they loved. They also have to put up
with the mood swings the asthmatic goes through due to some of the
drugs he/she is taking. And there is lots more that the family
suffers. Their unconditional love is incredible
and their ability to keep you going is outstanding.
I have a deep appreciation of been able to breath, but I have a
deeper appreciation and a deeper love for my family. I have learned to
tone down what I am going through, so it will not affect them too
much. After all, they are my life. Thinking of your family is as important as taking care
of your body so you can breath.
When
suffering an asthma attack, it is important for the people around you
not to show any fear, panic or despair because it is going to add to
the fear and panic you already feel. You will believe that the
fear and panic they are showing is because your condition is at its
worst and you are about to die.
Consult your physician, talk to your friends, go in the Internet
and gather information on better methods available to take care of
your asthma. You are doing this not only for you but for your family
as well.
Do not take breathing and love for granted. You have to work hard
on both.